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Waiting For Men

Length: 54mins
Published: 16 Jan, 2009
Last Updated: 18 May, 2011
In the red city of Oulata, on the far edge of the Sahara desert, an alien world exists. Men travel long distances for work and are away for months. But three women refuse to let their lives stop whilst the men are away. They paint beautiful patterns on the city walls, play games and speak refreshingly about what it means to be women waiting for men. Theirs is a magical world, breaking many of the stereotypes we associate with the region. Beautiful and haunting, like the vast desert that is their home.

‘There is the bride, the book, the shoulders’ - nicknames for the women sitting together in the moonlight, their white voiles flying up against the city’s red walls. ‘When I want my husband I press him up against me’, gossips Khady. She speaks of her fifth husband and Cheichs giggles in embarrassment. ‘In our culture it’s forbidden to express intimate things’ Cheich says. She sees waiting for her husband as a sign of a woman’s strength. But Massouda is content to be single after two failed marriages. ‘Now that I’m divorced, my body is mine to do with what I please’.

‘You look anxious. You must be thinking of him, a woman asks Khady. ‘It’s been a month and a half since he’s been back’ Khady admits. She takes her mind off Mohammed by preparing for his home-coming. Henna patterns decorate her delicate fingers, whilst Massouda’s fingers etch equally intricate designs on the city walls. Women hoping to impress their husbands pay Massouda for this artwork that she puts her heart into, communicating the love that Cheichs would never speak of, in each one. ‘There’s a lot of decency in these paintings’ Massouda says proudly.

The paintings divert the womens’ minds from many things. Khady sometimes fears the man she loves so much will not return. ‘My third husband promised me he would come back’ she remembers, ‘he never did’. Whilst for Cheichs the threat of adultery is a woman’s daily weight. ‘If he stops giving me pleasure, there is no trust any more’. Massouda has a very different dependence on the paintings. They free her from the fraught experience of waiting for a man. ‘It’s thanks to them that I’'m independent. Even alone I can provide for my own needs’.

Cheichs disapproves of Massouda’s work but whilst her husband is away, she cherishes quiet dreams about becoming a successful businesswoman. ‘I dream about making a fortune’ she smiles in a rare moment of abandon…

Then one day, quite suddenly, the men have returned. ‘Take some tea and come closer’ Khady says playfully, trying to contain her excitement. ‘She’s not a woman’ Cheichs says of the childless Khady, ‘my husband has brought back enough and he has given me children- what more is there?’ With the men home, Massouda no longer has a market for her painting. ‘I’'m not the patient type, with men who are not serious’ she smiles with sadness in her eyes, ‘could you declare your love to a man’s face?’

An often surprising and always spellbinding documentary, which takes a fresh look at female empowerment in one of Africa’s most remote regions.

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